Friday, November 19, 2010

My Nemesis (Maybe TMI??)

Ha!  No, really, potty training is seriously my nemesis.  And I'm putting this out there in hopes that someone may have had the same problems that I am currently having.  And maybe you can give me some advice!

We have been in potty training limbo for almost a year now!  And it isn't getting any better.  E mostly refuses to go in a diaper, makes a HUGE fuss anytime I ask her if she has to go potty or tell her it's time to go potty, and ends up wetting her underwear all day long. 

I've tried incentives, I've tried taking away toys when she wets her pants.  I've tried a potty schedule.  I've tried to just ignore it and put up with the wet underwear all day, but it really annoys me!

I've even put her back in diapers for a couple of weeks to try and "reset."  She loves our diapers - we use cloth and I made pretty ones with hello kitty and owls and all kinds of patterns.  But now her "diaper butt" is too big to fit under her clothes, and I don't think wearing diapers should be something she likes at this point.  Spending money on disposable diapers when I have perfectly good cloth ones makes me cringe.

And even when she's in diapers, she won't tell me when she has wet them.

At this point, I'm not sure if she's just being stubborn, is getting too involved in her play to bother going to the bathroom, or if she truly doesn't know when she has to go.  I should mention that she has had surgery dealing with her urinary tract system about a year and a half ago.  But I've mentioned my concerns to her urologist and he puts it all off on her age, not anything wrong with her system.

Any advice from one mom to another?
Thanks for letting me make my mini-rant!


Debbie said...

I feel your pain. : ) I do have 2 older children, so I have managed to potty train twice. The oldest was difficult,and the second was easy. My youngest is 37 months, and she'll only go wee in the potty if we put her on at the right time. We've also tried several incentives. She's gone on her own only a few times in the past several months. She positively refuses to poo in the potty, something which I believe stems from the severe constipation she had nearly a year ago, when we were trying to potty train (and it was going really well until then). She clearly understands where she's supposed to go, but she resists it. My oldest was not potty trained at this age either--he just wasn't bothered by messy pants. (I wasn't trained by this age myself, so my mom seems to think I had this coming, lol.) My second child would get upset and cry if she messed her pants, and she trained quickly. The oldest was day-trained by 3 1/2 years old and night-trained by 5. So I'm not worried-- just annoyed by how long it is taking (and tired of having to wash out messy pants). I'd love to hear some advice myself because what I tried with the other 2 isn't working with this one.

My Boys' Teacher said...

I used the "The Potty Boot Camp" with both boys. Trained my oldest in 1.5 days. Failed the first time with my youngest because his bladder was too immature (leaked urine every five minutes) but was successful six months later and trained him in 1.5 days as well.

The book addresses every single one of your problems and gives an action plan that is easy to follow which is why I am replying.

You can get a digital download at their website.

Two may not mind wet underwear but they usually HATE pee running down their legs. Naked training may work for her.

Also, you need to make it inconvenient for HER when she pees her pants. Right now it is just inconvenient for you. She should have to clean up her own mess (very Montessori). The book describes the steps of this...taking off their own clothes, putting them in the sink, rinsing them, wiping up the floor with paper towels, throwing them away (fun the first few times, but not as time goes on). THEN they have to "practice" getting on the potty ten times in a row (this is less Montessori and we modified this some, but it worked) the book calls this "potty drills."

Anyway, good SHORT book with a lot of variety in the solutions given.